Welcome to Dumpsville — Population: You. Breaking up is hard to do, but not that hard, because I just don’t like you anymore. But how to signify that in an easy way? Here are the methods by which I indicate to my significant other that I am “just not that into them” anymore. They are listed in order of increasing intensity. I hope that they work as well for you as they have for me:
- I respond to at least 40% of your interjections with the following word: “Huh.”
- I build a small fort in the center of the living room out of blankets, pillows, and a table, and name it “Oliver’s Place.” I spend a lot of time there. Not sure why exactly. I just feel safer and more secure there.
- When we watch the movie Star Wars I quote all the dialogue along with the movie in real…
View original post 640 more words