I fucked a sandwich bag filled with vaseline between my mattress and my bed frame.
I had sex with one of my moms decorative bird houses when I was 13 😦
I just saw a hole I knew I could put my dick in and then to just go for it. It was awful and I wouldn’t recommend it.
My first vibrator was a Tickle Me Cookie Monster. It was a great vibe, but unfortunately every time I pressed the button to make it wiggle, it yelled, “HAHAHA OH BOY OH BOY, OH BOY OH BOY.”
My parents had to have known.
When I was 14 I had just gotten my first cell phone (one of those small candy bar style Nokias) I got really horny and played with the vibration setting.
I had a cheap, blue, landline phone in my room…
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